December 28, 2006

• Strange how, even though I'm the one doing this whole Ph.D. nothin thing, I can still feel like everyone else has got their lives squared away, like things are finally coming together, that the seemingly endless turmoil of growing up is almost over.  I know this isn't true, but it's just what I've been feeling as of late.

  Being home makes me not want to leave home.  It's so comfortable here in Irvine.  We have EVERYTHING materialistic we need.  Don't tell me living in Irvine's bad, because it's NOT.  We are spoiled and don't even know it.  It's great!  ...

  Ok, so, what I really meant was...being home makes me re-evaluate my motives and my drive to get this thing done.  It's only been ONE QUARTER.  I'm supposed to do...(4 x 4 + 1 = 17) SEVENTEEN quarters of this.  Real grad school (research aspect) has not yet started for me, but already I'm thinking about how incredibly LONG > 4 years is.  I'm usually always up for a challenge, hence, why I decided to continue this whole higher education thing, but sometimes you just want to stop and see what happens.  See how far into failure you can really go.  Unfortunately, no can do...so I'll never find out.  I'm gonna try this new thing called making the "right" decision, even though it hurts or will be way too painful or means I'll have to be patient.  I don't really know what I mean by this...=o

  ...I WON $94 playing craps.  =D .  My family is weird.  My mom, imo, is racist and always makes these fobby, asian comments (although she's been here almost 40 years).  She also talks on and on about one subject while my dad perpetually nods his head "uh huh."  Of course I still love them. =D.  Titus has sleep apnea and it's really painful even to hear him try to sleep and gasp for air.  I think he may have to get surgery =(.  I really like Tim's girlfriend and she's supersweet and cute, too.  She bakes pies!  Oooh, that sounds good.  So, in Vegas I walked around a lot by myself and I didn't mind.  I got to think a lot while trying to look old(er) and sophisticated.  The guy at the Christian R. Lassen gallery showed me around and in the cool dimming room where the lights of the seascapes illuminated to the point of unreality (or reality, depending on how you want to interpret the spectacularness).  He also mentioned how I could own an original for ONLY $195,000.  He also gave me his card.  Forget my old list, here's the revised one, what I want to do with my money (which I don't have now, but hopefully someday may own some of my very own green goodness):
  -House (in a nice suburb of Orange County)
  -Car (I don't know cars so I can't say what kind)
  -no trampoline.  perhaps a tumble track
  -no pool (community pool only)
  -iPod (no, I don't own one now and don't plan to get one.  I don't listen to music because I'm boring.)
  -Bang! Card Game - really fun and more fun with lots of people (only $10 so I may just end up getting this before I get the job and money)
  -Christian Lassen Illumination Suite (I already own two $5 posters from Hawaii - Harmony and Golden Moments!  haha)

  Heaven's Path - (original includes 10 diamonds.  also hidden, the words truth, forgiveness, compassion, love?, 7 hearts, Lassen's name, and 7 something else?, closed gates - on journey to find "enlightenment")
  
  Seeking the Light (turmoil, arduous, treacherous journey)
   
  Illumination (yay, made it!  Glory glory Hallelujah!)
  

  Again, each original includes 10 diamonds.  The whole Illumination Suite can be yours for < $600,000 (?) !

  • 3:46 am
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